We Keep Saying We Want Something Different
I’ve been thinking about how much we say we want things to change in our lives.
We want to feel healthier, have more energy, feel less stressed, have more time for ourselves, maybe finally do some of those things we’ve been talking about doing for years.
And I don’t think we’re lying to ourselves when we say we want those things. I think we genuinely do.
But here’s something worth paying attention to.
If we took a closer look at our days, not just today, but the past few weeks, months, maybe even years, how different would they actually look?
We wake up, follow pretty much the same routine, react to the same things, make the same decisions, and go to bed thinking about everything we’d like to change.
And then we wake up and do it all over again.
So here’s my question.
If we’re making the same decisions every single day, why are we expecting our lives to look any different?
The Problem With Tomorrow
How many times have we decided that this is it? We’re going to start taking better care of ourselves. We’re going to make time for that thing we’ve been putting off. We’re finally going to do something about whatever has been bothering us.
And then what happens?
Tomorrow. Monday. Next month. When things calm down. When we have more energy. When we’re feeling a little more motivated.
There’s always a perfectly reasonable explanation for why today isn’t the day.
And the funny thing is, most of the time, nothing is actually stopping us from making a different choice. We’re just so used to making the familiar one that we barely notice we’re doing it.
I’ve done this myself more times than I can count.
We keep waiting for something to change so we can start doing things differently.
But what if we’ve had it backward all along?
A Walk or Another Hour at My Desk?
Let me give you a very ordinary example from my own life.
Let’s say one of my priorities is being healthy. I want to feel good, have energy, stay active, and take care of my body.
Now, imagine I’m sitting at my desk. I’ve been working for a while, and I have the opportunity to get up and go for a walk.
Do I particularly feel like going? Not really.
And it’s not like I’m sitting there wasting my time. I have things to do. There’s always another email, another idea, another little thing I could finish.
So staying at my desk makes perfect sense.
But here’s where it gets interesting.
I have two choices in front of me.
I can stay at my desk, which is what I’ve probably done a thousand times before.
Or I can get up and go for that walk.
Neither choice looks particularly important in that moment. It’s just a walk, after all.
But to me, there’s something much bigger happening.
When I choose to go for that walk, I’m making a decision based on the life I said I wanted, instead of automatically repeating what I’ve always done.
And that’s where change starts.
Not when I lose weight, not when I reach some fitness goal, not when I suddenly feel like a completely different person.
Right there. In that ordinary moment when I make a different decision.
Two Decisions, Two Different Directions
I think this is what we sometimes miss when we talk about changing our lives.
We imagine change as something big. A new beginning, a major decision, some incredible moment when everything finally clicks.
But so much of our life is shaped by decisions that don’t feel important enough to think twice about.
The decision to keep doing what we’ve always done, or to try something different.
The decision to keep saying yes when we really want to say no.
The decision to keep putting something off, or finally give it a little attention.
And no, I’m not saying we need to make the perfect decision every minute of every day.
Sometimes staying at my desk is exactly what I need to do. Sometimes resting is a better choice than pushing myself to do more.
That’s not the point.
The point is learning to recognize the difference between making a conscious choice and simply repeating an old pattern.
Because those patterns add up.
A day becomes a week. A week becomes a month. And before we know it, another year has gone by.
Then we look around and wonder why we’re still in exactly the same place.
So What Are You Choosing Today?
Here’s what I’ve learned from changing things in my own life.
I didn’t have to figure everything out before I started. And I certainly didn’t wake up one morning with all the motivation, discipline, and answers I thought I needed.
I had to start making decisions that matched what I wanted for myself.
Not all at once. Not perfectly. And definitely not without going back to old habits sometimes.
But more and more often, I started asking myself a different question.
Is this decision taking me closer to the life I want, or am I just doing what I’ve always done?
It’s a simple question, but it can make you look at your everyday choices very differently.
Because the life we want isn’t something that just appears one day because we’ve wanted it badly enough.
We have to participate in creating it.
And maybe today, that looks like nothing more exciting than getting up from your desk and going for a walk.
But think about it.
If yesterday you would have stayed sitting, and today you decided to get up, something has already changed.
You made a different decision.
And if you keep making different decisions, you can’t expect to keep arriving at exactly the same place.
So maybe instead of asking ourselves when our lives are finally going to change, we should start paying attention to what we’re choosing today.
Because that’s where we actually have a say in what happens next.
Always with so much love,
Gaby
Unbecoming Average
If you’ve been wanting things to change but aren’t sure where to start, I’d love to hear what’s been keeping you stuck. You can always send me a message. Sometimes a conversation is a good place to begin.